A KID LIKE ME???

Knowing this kid, and from the expression on her face along with her crossed arms, I have to wonder what she's thinking. Probably something like, "Geez, when is this old buggah going to pop off."

FIRST TIME FOR THIS

Whenever repairs are needed at the senior residence, I don't usually call ahead to make an appointment. I just show up because most always, the occupant is home. The other day, I knock on a door and a woman responds before opening the door, "Who is it?" Always best to be careful before opening your door to a stranger. I say, "I'm here to fix your kitchen faucet." She says, "What color is your shoes?" "Excuse me?" She replies, "Do you have on yellow shoes?"
"No I don't have on yellow shoes" and wonder if I should start running. Besides, who the hell shows up wearing yellow shoes to do repairs. She opens the door, and my curiosity kicked in. She explained that a previous repairman had been very rude to her, and after listening to her story, I had to agree. Of course, there's always two sides to every complaint. I ask, "Can you describe the repairman?" Her reply was, "He had on YELLOW SHOES!" Geez! I'm not looking forward to gettin' old.

DIET IMPROVEMENT

One of these items is supposed to be bad for you. However, I'm not able to figure out which one.
Chomp, chomp...........OH, MAMA!!!

GOT MONEY IN THE STOCK MARKET?

Here's where it's going!
Damn! Where did I put the rope.....?

Today, I walk into the local Lowe's hardware store and the first thing that confronts me is the following:
Geez! The start of October and already Santa is beckoning. Wondering why so early, I did some research, and here's an excerpt of something I found.

<<Jesus never commanded Christians to celebrate his birth. Rather, he told his disciples to memorialize, or remember, his death. (Luke 22:19, 20) Christmas and its customs come from ancient false religions. The same is true of Easter customs, such as the use of eggs and rabbits. The early Christians did not celebrate Christmas or Easter, nor do true Christians today.>>

WTF!!! It took me all these years to find this out! All the people that make themselves "nuts" during the Christmas season.....not really necessary. Just think, instead of just the "big guys" screwing our economy, the little guy now has an opportunity to play, as well. How you ask? Don't shop for xmas presents. We'll show those overpaid, under-performing CEO's along with the board of directors creating their compensation packages how to do something "first class." So there!

I'M SO EXCITED

It has been hinted that a particle accelerator like "CERN" could be on the way to becoming a "TIME Machine." Hoping to live long enough to have it come to fruition so that I may be transported from place to place by it instead of having to use the airline industry. Just think...Place to place in an instant! No TSA, cramped seats, inadequate leg room, over-bookings, complicated seat pricing, delays, lost baggage, cancellations, sleeping pilots, and surly flight attendants.
When the wheel was invented, I'm sure there was someone who said to his kid, "Can't get any better than this."

When I was playing pong on a Commodore Vic-20, I said to my kid, "Can't get any better than this."








Hmmm.....Wonder what in the future the kids of today will think can't get better than this.


C'mon Jesus, let me live to a thousand.

NICE TO BE APPRECIATED

So, yesterday I did some home repairs for a young woman, and when finished, she exclaimed, "I'm so happy I could just kiss you!" If it were not for the giant Samoan guy standing next to her, I would have considered accepting the offer. Kiss....? Giant Samoan....? Hmmm....I'm not stupid! "Kiss me, kiss me!" Giant Samoan stepped forward.
Didn't take long for me to pick up my tools and run.

WASN'T LIKE THIS WHEN I WAS A KID

When Aaron came to visit, part of it took him towards Waianae, and he was shocked to see the number of homeless tents along the coast. I thought he was exaggerating, and since I have not been that way for a long time, I decided to see for myself. In a word, "Appalling." Lots and lots of tents. What a friggin' shame. One can only hope few tourists get out this way.

Do you suppose they're burying their dead on the beach?

Lots of this along side the road

At least the shoreline along Yokohama Bay looks the same.

Although there are a lot of feral cats in the area.

REALLY LOOKIN' FORWARD TO GETTIN' OLD

With each passing day, I'm seeing old people do things that really freak me out. I know at some point I'll start to do some of the same, and because of this, I want someone to shoot me just before I start to get old in about twenty/thirty years.
Here's an example. Yesterday, I went to a senior residence to do some repairs in several apartments. Usually, most people are home (because they're old), so I didn't call in advance. Knock on the door, and someone answers, even though it takes some time for them to get to the door.

Probably because they're doing this

I ring the doorbell to one of the apartments and bend down to look through the peep hole for some movement from within. Ah, some movement, she's home. After a time, the woman finally opens the door and I see her standing there in a housecoat that is open in the front and her underware is down around her knees.
My eyes are burning, my eyes are burning!....what the hell do I do now????

Visualize something like this with her drawers down around her knees. I did learn something about myself. I stutter big time and my brain doesn't always work well enough to get me out of unexpected encounters.

A FUN DAY ON THE JOB

Yesterday, I'm doing some work at a house, and one of the repairs on the punch list was to replace a bedroom door knob. While I'm doing it, I see the mother on the bed trying to coax her kid to take a nap.

He's not cooperating and the mother is getting frustrated.



I continue on with the rest of the repairs and soon, the mother comes into the living room and says to her husband, "He's finally asleep." My last repair was to install a clothes dryer vent system which meant having to make a hole through the exterior wall of the house. Ironic, but the dryer was located in the garage directly below the kid's room. Can you guess what happened after the third pound on the siding with a hammer?
Got to wonder what was going through the mother's mind when
this happened.Finished the job and left without saying good-bye.